WHITE WEDDING IN THE MIDST OF ZIMBABWE'S ECONOMIC CRISIS

I know I can’t dance nor can I sing. I didn’t dance during my wedding, this was thanks to the fact that MaNyoni was expecting our first son within a few days after our wedding and she could not dance and by default I also didn’t dance. Our white wedding was on Saturday 14 December 2002. The church ceremony was at one of the Methodist Churches in Chitungwiza and the wedding reception was at Lord Malvern High School in Waterfalls where MaNyoni had also gone to school for her A’ Levels. Personally I did not see the value of a white wedding over and above the African Lobola ceremony and that view has not changed. Also growing up, I was against the lobola practice. With time I began to embrace that tradition. Feminists are of the view that lobola practice has been preserved because it benefits men, I think they have a point there because most of the money and cows goes to the father. In 1996 when my older sister eloped, her boyfriend came home to initiate the Lobola practice and also in 2006 when my youngest sister got married, In both cases as father figure in my family, I pocketed the money and my mother's youngest sister was not happy with that.

My African wedding/Lobola negotiation was on 8 September 2001 (one day I will blog about that experience). As a young man raising lobola money, it shows commitment to your girlfriend. I think it shows that you are becoming a man. Needless to say the lobola charge must be reasonable. I grew up hearing stories that you must never marry from Masvingo Province as they are always expensive. In my defence, I am not the first one in our extended family to marry from Masvingo province, the first person to do so was my cousin, sekuru Gibson. After our lobola ceremony MaNyoni moved in with me in Avondale where I had been renting since 1999. It was her wish to have a white wedding. Our first proposed date was in April 2002 and we had to cancel that date after my mother became seriously ill and she eventually died in February 2002. I started dragging my feet and I was considering a simple civil marriage ceremony at the Magistrates office. My wife was not very happy with that and I saw that it was causing a lot of tension and I compromised. Marriage is like a government of national unity where the ruling party and the opposition comes to form a government. You can’t always get your way. Some days I fee like the ruling party and some days I feel like the opposition party. Compromise is the name of the game.

We settled for the date of 14 December 2002 and we booked the hall. We started making arrangements such as choosing a wedding cake, printing invitation cards. After the Zimbabwean dollar lost value at the end of 1997, life in Zimbabwe had became unbearable. In 2002 Morgan Tsvangirai had lost the presidential election in a dubious election and the farm invasions were in full swing, life became even harder in Zimbabwe. A month before our wedding, I got a job as a junior manager and the job came with the use of the company car. A lot of people offered us help, my father in law slaughter a cow for use during our wedding, my wife’s uncle offered us the disco and the public address system for the wedding, we bought food for the wedding. My friend Cornelius Takawira was still in UK then and when I told him about the wedding he said, “Tsano I will help you”. When the date approached there was a fuel crisis in Harare. I drove to Mutoko and Murewa a day before the wedding. I came back with my sister in law and my grandmother. I passed through Musami to tell my mother’s eldest sister about the wedding. I honestly did not want her to come as I did not need complications. She refused to attend the wedding and I was relieved as I did not want any drama on my wedding day.

I drove to the Hall and I saw it was decorated beautifully in the colours chosen by MaNyoni, the colour I saw was purple but she called it Lilac colour. Anyway I was never good with colours. MaNyoni and I joined the petrol queue at a BP garage in Newlands, Harare that afternoon where my father’s cousin sekuru Adolf worked as they were expecting fuel delivery that day. Whilst in the fuel queue, I got a call that the General Manager- Finance had turned down my request to use the BMW executive pool car as our wedding car. Anyway I never liked a BMW. We left the BP garage late in the night and there was no fuel delivery. Early on Saturday morning on the day of the wedding, I received a call from a money changer to say that I needed to collect money that had been sent to me by Cornelius from UK, around 6am my friend Trevor Midlane brought 20 litres of petrol in a container. We left home to collect the money and then drove straight to Westgate Shopping Centre to buy our wedding rings at an Indian Jewellery Shop. The rings we got were a bit over size and there was no time to resize them. After a few years my ring fits perfectly but I can’t say the same about the member of opposition. Some years ago the member of opposition was washing clothes at our home in Zimre Park and she realised that she had thrown away the dirty water with her wedding ring and started crying. Fortunately my brother in law was around and looked for the ring and found it.

After buying the wedding rings, MaNyoni went into Harare CBD where her cousin mainini Anna was going to do her hair. Anna came in late. Reverend Balangile started phoning us as we were late for our wedding. MaNyoni said to me, let not worry about anything we did our best if anything is going to go wrong today let it be. I was worried that MaNyoni should not have so much stress considering that she was about to give birth. Trevor was going to drive to South Africa that day with his family and had offered to carry MaNyoni from home to church. Trevor picked up MaNyoni in town and he drove her home and waited for her to change and then drove her to church. I picked up the wedding cake in Avondale and drove to the church with one of the messengers from work. When I got to Chitungwiza, the messenger went back to collect my grandmother. The wedding ceremony started and went on for hours. When I go to church, I prefer spending around an hour or so as I do not have a huge concentration span. For years, I would attend the early morning English service at Trinity Methodist Church and the service would last roughly an hour. That long service did a good thing because shortly after my father in law became a born again Christian and is now a regular church member of The Dutch Reformed Church of Zimbabwe.

The messenger who went with my car never came back and we now had one car short. There were only two or three vehicles available. I remember the two Peugeot 306 sedans belonging to my work colleagues Agrippah Marangwanda and Austin Samakande. With the way I hate French cars, I can’t still it that believe our main transport during our wedding was made done by French cars. We then drove to Waterfalls and because everyone was short of fuel, we were not able to drive to Harare for the flowers. The wedding reception went on very well. Unlike the Lobola ceremony a number of MaNyoni’s relatives did not attend our wedding. What had happened was that around August 2002, MaNyoni’s cousin had a wedding in Mabelreign which we attended and about 6 weeks before our wedding, that cousin was driving from Bulawayo to Victoria Falls for work purposes and he was involved in an accident and his wife died in that accident. Some of the relatives wanted our wedding to be postponed and we decided to go ahead with our wedding.

During the wedding my uncle who is my father’s only sibling gave a beautiful speech, so did his wife who stood as my mother. My aunt my father's cousion also gave a beautiful speech. My aunt Mrs Maposa looks like my mother in law so I was chuckling when relatives from MaNyoni’s side was confusing my aunt with my Mother in Law. We went outside Lord Malvern and the photographers took hundreds of wedding photos. After the wedding reception we counted the money that we had been given by friends and relatives. We paid the decoration guys, caterers, photographers etc. We then went to my in-laws house in Chitungwiza and left around 8pm to go to Harare CBD. A friend of my sister had given us a complimentary voucher for 2 nights at Cresta Lodge. Because MaNyoni was expecting soon after the wedding, we had decided to go for our honeymoon holiday around September 2002, we had spent 10 days in Bulawayo, Hwange National Park and Victoria Falls.

Due to the economic situation in Zimbabwe at that time we did not manage to have the wedding we had planned, however we did really enjoy our wedding. A lot of friends chipped in to make our wedding possible and we did not pay for cars for the wedding as my work friends chipped in, Onias my brother in law taught the bride and groom party wedding steps free of charge. My father in law provided a whole cow for the beef used during our wedding. A lot of people who provided services were work friends whom we only paid after the wedding. I really took to heart what Reverend Balangile said to us that day. From a personal finance point of view, white weddings for young couples, I do not encourage them especially if they are the ones footing the bill. As a young couple you are busy buying furniture, saving deposit for your first home etc. You then are forced to part with huge amount of money for an event that lasts less than 12 hours and can leave you with a serious debt. One of the main reason why people divorce is money problems. My view is that when you pay for your Lobola, the marriage officers should come and let you sign your marriage certificate.

MARY CHIWENGA’S SAGA- WHY I DON’T SUPPORT THE PERSECUTION OF ANY WOMAN

Last night before Rangarirai our 7 year old son went to bed, he came to our bedroom and hugged his mother and kissed her goodnight. He did not even talk to me and went out of the room. I said to MaNyoni, I feel like I am invisible and she answered me back, “Do you expect him to kiss another man good night? It made sense. After work, I normally get home a minute or so ahead of her mother as I always use the stairs. When I open the door, Ranga always ask me where is mama and at times he does not even greet me and then wait by the door for his mother. To be fair I am not really invisible to him, when he fights with his older brothers he comes to me to report . Ranga also thinks I am an ATM because anything he wants to be bought for him he asks me to buy. For the past weeks he had been asking me to buy him a Nintendo Switch and I eventually goggled the price, a whooping R6 000.00, I can’t afford that.

Yesterday I read on social media that Mary Chiwenga the estranged young wife to Rtd General Chiwenga the Vice President of Zimbabwe had been arrested. The story did not make sense as it involved the Zimbabwe Anti Corruption Commission. For a start any serious anti-corruption drive will start with investigating and arresting heavy weights such as Obert Mpofu who is rumored to own over 50% of properties in Victoria Falls town centre and the rest of Zanu-Pf leadership. To make the story even bizarre it involved the Judge President George Chiweshe himself a retired senior military officer. George Chiweshe is regarded as a coup judge in some circles after he passed a ruling to say the military coup that forced Robert Mugabe from office was legal. George Chiweshe is also known for the dark period of 2008. After Morgan Tsvangirai trounced Robert Mugabe in the first round of Presidential elections at the end of March 2008, George Chiweshe then as the Chairperson of the Zimbabwe Electoral Commission sat on the results for over a month whilst the military was strategizing. He then later on announced that Morgan Tsvangirai had only got 47% of the vote and Robert Mugabe had secured about 43% and there was going to be a runoff between Tsvangirai and Mugabe in June 2008.

The military took over the Zanu-PF campaign and senior military officers were seconded to supervise the violent campaign that saw over 200 MDC supporters murdered, thousands injured and more than ten thousand were forced to flee their homes. Morgan Tsvangirai had no choice but to withdraw from the runoff election. A lot of us are convinced that Morgan Tsvangirai had won the first round convincingly but the military tempered with the figures to force a run off. I also don’t like Mary Chiwenga but even for my enemies, I want them to get a fair trial and that is what one expects from a civilized society. I also expect Grace Mugabe to be taken through the legal process for all her transgressions and for pay back on how she humiliated the ruling elite during the funeral of Robert Mugabe. I also dislike Grace Mugabe and even for her, she should face a fair legal process. I doubt that Mary Chiwenga will face an impartial judicial process.

The way the general is treating his estranged wife rings alarm bells for me. If he treats the mother of her children that way what more for an opposition supporter or any ordinary citizen. When his children ask him where their mother is what will he say? If he can’t have empathy for the anguish that his children are going to face, we are in trouble as a country as he is one of those effectively running the country and is in line to become the next president of Zimbabwe. Children should only be taken away from their mother in exceptional circumstances especially after a fair court process has deemed it fit that the mother is a danger to her children. Most of us turned out okay because our mothers were there to care for us after the death of our fathers. Persecution of any woman is a no for me. Women are the most marginalized people in our society; I saw what my mother went through after my father’s death. The face of poverty in Africa is black and female. Even in the corporate world, women have a glass ceiling as most top positions are occupied by male. Many people including women seem to believe that any woman rising in the workplace do not do so on merit. I also saw firsthand the disadvantage for women when I saw my wife struggling to find employment for almost 11 years in South Africa despite the fact that she was also qualified and had the suitable experience.

To anyone especially women celebrating the persecution that Mary Chiwenga is going through due to political differences, they should pose and see the bigger picture. This is about abuse of power by the general and the ruling party.

WHY I HATE SOCIALISM

Around 1am this morning when I woke up, I saw tweets from Economist Thabi Leoka summarising the statement from global rating agency S&P and their opinion on the dismal state of the South African economy. We are at a tipping point and this need strong political will to solve. For years we have debated if South Africa will become another failed African state the way Zambia, Zimbabwe, Uganda etc. went after the attainment of independence. We are only now realising the full negative effects of the economy mismanagement and corruption that became more apparent especially during the reign of Jacob Zuma. What is happening to SAA is not new it has happened elsewhere in Africa after independence. At independence in 1980 Rhodesian Airways was a vibrant airline with a fleet of aircraft and as we speak Air Zimbabwe has only 1 functioning old aeroplane with hundreds of employees. Zimbabwe Electricity Supply Authority the equivalent of Eskom in Zimbabwe is on its knees and it generates less than 700 mega watts of electricity and has to rely on imports from Eskom and Mozambique. In 2005 as part of insurance managers risk survery I once visited Hwange Colliery company that digs coal and pass it on to ZESA. It boggled my mind how a company would fail in a simple task of digging and transporting coal less than 15kms to the power stations.

National Railways of Zimbabwe once a giant in the Southern Africa region an equivalent of Transnet Freight Rail and PRASA combined in South Africa is on its knees. Almost all SOEs in Zimbabwe are technically insolvent as is the case in South Africa with the likes of SAA, ESKOM, Denel, RAF, PetroSA, SABC etc. Some have argued that blacks can’t run government and SOEs efficiently and that has been debunked if you look at the experience of Botswana. Botswana once a protectorate of Britain and when it attained its independence in 1966 it was one of the poorest countries in the world. I visited Gaborone in 1989 during a school trip from Zimbabwe, I can tell you there was nothing impressive about Gaborone then. At the end of 2006 my family visited Gaborone, I could see the marked difference and the road from Francistown to Gaborone was being constructed afresh yet Zimbabwe still relies on road constructed by Ian Smith over 40 years ago. I will be visiting the Botswana soon and I expect to see major changes. Now tens of thousands of Zimbabweans work in Botswana.

Another proof to debunk that blacks are incompetent is my experience in Zimbabwe from 2002 to 2007 as an insurance manager. I dealt with executives from big companies such as OK Zimbabwe, Zimasco, Bindura Nickel Corporation, Anglo American, Rio Tinto, TA Holdings, United Refineries, Cairns, Astra, Dairiboard, Kindgom Financial Holdings, Econet Wireless etc. and those companies were being managed predominantly managed by Africans. Some of those managers are my friends on social media and some of them were my MBA classmates in Harare in 2005. Many South African owned subsidiaries in Zimbabwe are being run by Africans in Harare despite their refusal to transform here in South Africa. Examples include Stanbic Bank owned by Standard Bank, Old Mutual, Zimplats owned by Implats of South Africa, Pick and Pay, Nedbank Zimbabwe, National Breweries owned by South African Breweries, Anglo American etc., Megapak Zimbabwe owned by Nampak, African Distillers Ltd owned by Distell etc.

The problem that these liberation movements did was to remove meritocracy and they started rewarding home girls and home boys and gave them complex institutions to manage. They rewarded political cronies to these top positions and ignored experts. As we speak African executives do not last long in these SOEs due to too much political interference. For example SAA was under the leadership of Ms Dudu Myeni for a number of years and from what I know her only qualifications was being a teacher and being close to former president Jacob Zuma. The government has no business running any business because of the way government is set up it is bound to fail. Government managers and politicians cannot stand up to unions because these unions are part of the governing party. In South Africa for almost every R1 the government collects almost 50c is going towards paying state employees and the percentage is rising at a faster pace than inflation yet we are seeing economic growth rates of closer to 0%. On average a government employee earns more that an employee in private sector. The government needs to be strict with public section unions on sustainable wage bill and also with how it manages public funds as any mismanagement has a direct negative effect on citizens and no wonder tens of thousands are migrating to stable economies. Money does not grow on trees.

My first job after high school was working for the government as a temporary teacher from 1996 to 1997. I had to adjust when I joined the private sector in 1997. My first posting was a school very close to the border with Mozambique in Mudzi, we had one bus plying our route. Each month teachers would miss school one Friday and one Monday as you had to catch the bus in the morning on Friday in order to get to the nearest bank in Murewa. On the Monday you would catch the bus in Harare on Monday morning and only arrive at work in the evening. Everyone on the same grade earned the same salary your performance did not matter, people would be paid slightly more depending on the number of years in service, qualifications etc. Some of the most demoralised people I ever met were teachers. In private sector a person is not paid according to qualifications but mainly due to the value they bring to the company. You might have 40 years experience and a young guy who just finished Matric can potentially come and earn more that you if he can give more value to the company. It is no coincidence that China has rose over the last four decades and is on course to overtake United States to become the biggest economy in the world. The following quotation from former Chinese leader Deng Xiaoping sums it all,” It doesn’t matter whether a cat is white or black, as long as it catches mice”. Deng led China through far reaching market-economy reforms. China is no longer a socialist country as they discover that it does not work.

The same laid back workers you find in organisations such as Home Affairs especially at Beitbridge Border post, if you put them in private companies they will become top performers. In government there is very little consequence management. I will give an example, a few months ago I knocked off work around 6pm and I left home to go and pay our electricity and property rates monthly bill. The revenue office at Tramshed Pretoria CBD is supposed to close at 7pm. Around 6:50pm as I climbed the stairs, I met three ladies on their way home and they asked me if I was going to City of Tshwane offices and I said yes, they then informed me that they had already closed for the day and they started laughing. I looked at the time and I thought they were joking and I proceeded to the entrance and sure enough it was closed a good 10 minutes early Wow. Incidentally last year, I was working on a shift that ended at 8pm on a Thursday evening. Exactly at 7:59pm, I received a call from a client who was worried that the guard who had been arranged early in the day had not arrived at 6pm as discussed. It took me almost 30 minutes to sort out the problem. I could not say sorry my shift is ending in 60seconds I can’t help.

Another problem is with unions. A few months ago, I had a discussion with a gentleman and he told me that he was a headmaster/principal for a government school around Pretoria and in the same sentence he told me that he was the union representative. That discussion has been bugging me ever since. From my school days and my days as a teacher, I always knew that the headmaster is the manager for the school on behalf of the department of education. How can a manager also be a unionised worker? So the unions have a say on who gets promoted. How does he then manage teachers and other staff members at the school. In my 22 years working in the private sector both as an ordinary employee or as a manager, I had never came across such a confusing situation. Maybe it explains why the standard of education in most government township and rural schools is below par. A school manager should not involve himself or herself in union matters period. The biggest hurdle that President Cyril Ramaphosa will have is dealing with the unions in both parastatals and public service, he better not blink as we are on a tipping point. SAA owes more than R13 billion, ESKOM has a debt of over R400 billion and Road Accident Fund has a short fall of R26 billion. Other SOEs such as PRASA, Denel, SABC etc. also owes billions of Rands.

The ruling party has indicated that it is ready to implement the National Health Insurance and that is a disaster waiting to happen it will be on the scale of Eskom if not worse. I see government employing tens of thousands of health and support employees who will demand huge salaries thereby increasing public spending to unsustainable levels. My take is that the government has no business running businesses, they should rather spend their time enforcing existing laws such as Employment equity and establishing the enabling environment for business.

I really fear for the future of South Africa. If South Africa is downgraded by all rating agents, I fear the Rand devaluing further and the foreign debt repayments increasing. The disaster we saw in Zimbabwe will be a picnic given the volatility of the South African society and the huge size of South African economy. We saw this week the Monetary Policy Committe of South African Reserve Bank was nervous about cutting interest rates. I remember vividly the crisis in Zimbabwe after the fall of the Zimbabwean dollar in 1997, the Reserve Bank of Zimbabwe increased interest rates to try and defend the country, I struggled to pay my debts then. Imagine the disaster in South Africa if interest rates are increased by even 3% many people will not manage. President Cyril Ramaphosa and Ministers Tito Mboweni and Pravin Gordhan please do not blink. I hope the leader of the opposition Mr John Steenhuisen supports the president in parliament should the vote of no confidence motion be introduced to stop Mr Ramaphosa from going ahead with the necessary restructuring processes.

God bless South Africa and Africa.

SOUTH AFRICA REMINDS ME OF ZIMBABWE IN THE MID 1990s

A few minutes  ago I listened with horror as the SAA employee representative said the strike was a success 😳 SAA is technically insolvent, no bank can loan it money yet employees are striking for an 8% salary increase 🤷🏿‍♂️SAA has a government guaranteed debt of almost R13 billion and the government just gave them R5.5 billion. Elsewhere in South Africa most taxpayers who are funding SAA were lucky to get even 2% salary increase, the rest are unemployed or facing imminent retrenchment.

Do we really need SAA? My opinion is it should be shut permanently so that we move on to Eskom, PRASA, DENEL, SABC, huge civil service wage bill. Eskom has a debt of R400 billion. Public sector wages consume at least half of the budget and due to powerful unions that bill is increasing much higher than inflation. The economy will only grow by 0.5% this year. My unsolicited advice from someone who saw the unraveling in Zimbabwe from a similar situation, if you can leave the country please do. For my Zimbabwean friends in South Africa please have some assets in Zimbabwe before the fan hit the sh*t. 

The politicians in South Africa can’t grasp the seriousness of the situation, they are planning to launch National Health Insurance another financial disaster waiting to happen, they must just look to Britain how this is an unwise move. My prediction is that South African government debt will be downgraded. Eventually interest rates will increase, the Rand will devalue making the foreign debt more expensive to service. This government will most likely increase VAT rates, more fuel levy including Road Accident fund levies which are increasing much higher than inflation. By the way RAF debt is more than R26 billion.

The middle class in South Africa is in a fix, medical aid contributions are higher than pension fund contributions and now you need Gap cover 😢, you have to pay for private or semi private school education, levies at complexes due to high crime rates. The fuel price will continue increasing due to RAF and very high government tax on fuel. The public transport is non functional. Oh I almost forgot there is E-toll debt. I really regretted missing the window of opportunity to emigrate to Australia after I arrived in SA around 2007 to 2010. Some of my friends are trying Canada good luck on them, personally I wouldn’t survive in that weather. 

With the increasing number of unemployed, I expect the support for EFF to keep on growing. I like EFF leaders but their economic policies keep me awake at night. I fear fascism taking hold in South Africa due to lack of transformation and inequality. The unemployment for whites is around 6%  and they earn three times the average African, yet 52% of African youth are unemployed 😢

IS IT BLACK TAX OR JUST UBUNTU?

A lot of close relative will not be happy that I wrote this article. In my culture we rarely talk about our feelings, we always sweep everything under the carpet. I find writing therapeutic and it helps me to cope with a lot of stressful situations.

My cousin Remembrance Mukarakate looked at me with pity in his eyes and said, “munin’ina wasiirwa nhamo” (young brother, your father has left you a huge burden). I am the first born in a family of five. I was 14 then, I did not panic because the strongest person I have ever known, my mum was still around. It was in early November 1990 during my father’s funeral in our village nearer to Jekwa School in Murewa. Three days before, I woke up in the morning preparing to go to school, I told my mum about the dream I had the previous night about my father, I had dreamed that he had died. After I told my mum about the dream she told me to go to school. My father had been ill since 1989 and he was suffering from HIV/AIDS and he looked like someone in his 80s yet he died a few months after his 36^th birthday. I came back from school later that evening and I was told an ambulance had taken my father to Marondera General Hospital. Message came back to say he had died. His colleagues in the police wanted to go and personally deliver the news to my paternal grandmother. I volunteered to show them the way to our village. We drove via Macheke commercial farming areas, Nhowe Mission and the police Land Rover truck reached my grandmother around midnight.

I had not slept for two nights. My parents come from neighbouring villages so I decided to go to my maternal grandfather’s home to catch up on some sleep since everyone was at the funeral. My maternal grandmother had died about three weeks before. Mukoma Remember was there and he was on hand to remind me of the grim reality that lay ahead. After the burial we went back home to Dombotombo police station. About three weeks later we were back in the village where my father’s clothes were distributed and most of it was given to me as I was almost his height. My father’s will was read and after that my mother was given a stick. My father’s brother and his half brother and myself were asked to sit in front. I saw my mother passing my two uncles and giving the stick to me to signify that she did not want to be inherited as a wife by either of my two uncles and instead she just wanted to raise her children.

My uncle and his wife would visit us once or twice, my uncle asked my mum to give him part of the pension money as he now wanted to write O’Level exams. My uncle had been forced to leave school in form three (grade 9) around 1983-1984 under the harsh Zimbabwean government policies after he impregnated the sister of the headmaster. He had worked for almost 6 years using his Zimbabwe Junior Certificate results as a temporary teacher in a primary school close to the Mozambican border. I don’t know why he had not furthered his education then. Now with the end of the civil war in Mozambique qualified teachers were now accepting teaching posts closer to the border. We learnt that my uncle had taken the government cheque meant for my mother and fraudulently cashed the cheque for my father’s last salary for November 1990. I never saw my uncle again until I went to his house in Epworth in 1996 when my sister had eloped. My uncle refused to accept the money saying I must take it as I was their rightful father and not him. I would connect with my uncle when I started working in Harare in 1997 and he had borrowed money from me a few times promising to pay me back and he was now refusing. I then told my mum about it and she went to demand the money and when she got it, I asked her to keep the money. I then kept my distance.

When my father’s pension came out around July 1991 we had to move out of the police accommodation. My mother took all the money and bought an incomplete 2 bedroom house from the municipality. The expectation from both side of the family was that my mother would come back to the village with her five kids. The house had only two outside doors no window frames, no electricity and not plastered. We got old iron roof sheets and closed the gaping holes on the windows and we had to deal with the vicious mosquito. A few months later my father’s insurance policy paid out, my mother and I had been named as the co-beneficiaries. From my mother’s portion of the insurance payout, I accompanied her to the hardware and we bought window frames and the internal doors and cement. My portion of the payout was transferred to the Master of High Court in Harare since I was still a minor that time. My mother was now receiving a merge government pension for widows as well as money for all of us dependants. The money was strictly paid on the last day of the month. It was always difficult in December because on Christmas day we would be virtually starving and then my mother would go and collect the money from the post office on 31 December. Even at 15 my mother now asked me to help draw up a budget from the little money she was getting. My mum had a huge garden at home where she was growing vegetables. In the rainy season she would grow maize, pumpkins, ground nuts and round nuts in the municipality lands. She would also go to the farmer’s market around 4am to buy vegetables for sale. Some of the neighbours would help us where they could.

The life of poverty is dis-empowering. I would eat in the morning then walk and run almost 6kms to school and did not eat anything during the day. At lunch break I avoided hanging around other school children as you can’t always burden them in them having to share their lunch with you. After school I would walk home and get there around 5pm eat and then dash to Dombotombo library and study until it closed at 7pm. During school holidays, I would eat in the morning spend the day at the library and then come back during lunch at times go to the nearest bush and gather the brown kennels that pop up with seeds that came off the msasa trees put them in a sack. Some people would defecate under the trees, so you had to try to avoid touching human waste. Get home start a fire using those kennels and roast dried maize, eat and drink some water and go back to the library and study until the library closed. My mother only managed to connect electricity at home when I was in form 3 and before that I used a paraffin lamp to study as candles were very expensive. My mother could not afford to buy us new clothes so we did with second hand cloth coming from overseas via Mozambique. The best cloths we had were uniforms. At the beginning of the year my mother would get quotations from school uniform shops for many pairs of uniform for me. We would then go to the Master of High Court in Harare and get a cheque. She would then buy about two pairs of uniforms for all of us. Another challenge was the issue of blankets, Marondera is a very cold place and it was normally worse during frost month of July. At times I doubted that I would escape the life of poverty despite all my mother told me about the importance of education.

In 1992 my mother became seriously ill. I really feared for the worst. I had seen how my father had suffered. My father had coughed constantly, lost so much weight and at one time he could barely see so I had to hold his hands wherever we travelled to see church or anywhere. In Dombotombo police station we were using a communal toilet so I played close by so that I could hold his hand to the toilet. Relatives from both sides of the family were not happy that my mother had not gone back to the village after my father’s death. I knew that if my mother died before I finished high school our lives would turn out for the worse. My mother recovered but gradually over the years her health continued to deteriorate, we continued with our daily struggles. Later after I finished O’Level my mother teamed up with other former spouses of policemen to become a volunteer she had connected with under the Kuyedza Women’s club a women’s organisation for policemen wives. They had formed an NGO that was equipping spouses of farm workers with skills. My mother had done courses such as dress making when my father was still alive. With the allowances she got our life improved marginally. Even though we were poor, we were much better off than my cousins and other relatives back in the village. Relatives would always visit us when they were looking for work as domestic workers, applying for passports or drivers’ licence in town etc.

In early 1996 I started looking for a temporary teaching vacancies in government primary schools with my O’Level certificate. When my A’Level results came out, I did not make it to the University fo Zimbabwe. I could now teach in secondary schools since I had passed A’Level. I got my first teaching post at Chimukoko Secondary School in Mudzi starting 1 September 1996. I went to Mbare Musika and bought two used formal trousers and three used white shirts and those were my work clothes until I got paid. In October 1996 I got paid my salary for two months it was $4 000.00, I had never seen so much money in my life. No one had to beg me to do anything at home. I already knew what was expected of me and I just did it without complaining. I went home bought a double cassette radio, a 14” black and white TV and that was the first TV we ever had in my mother’s house. I then bought groceries. I got another teaching post at Chifamba Secondary school closer to the Suswe business centre for two more months. In December 1996 I got paid my two months salary together with a part of the annual bonus and it was almost $4 700.00. I bought Christmas clothes for my mum and all my siblings. I then connected a landline telephone line at home. For the first time since my father’s death we had something for Christmas. In January 1997 I was given an annual contract at Kambarami Secondary school very close to Murewa town centre. I would now go back home to Marondera every Friday night and then come back on Monday morning. I was teaching form 1 and 2 (grade 8 and 9).

My sister had left home in early 1996 to go and stay with her boyfriend when she fell pregnant, she had failed her O’Level exams. My sister and the baby were struggling and I told her to come back home. She started going to night school. I never wanted to be a teacher and I was busy with my Chartered Institute of Management Accounting (CIMA-UK) studies. In July 1997 I got an apprenticeship contract with NCR Systemedia in their printing division and I started working in Southerton Industrial area in Harare, our factory was between CAPS and National Breweries. I was staying with my aunt Mrs Maposa and her family in Sunningdale and I would walk through Mbare Township to and from work, the allowance as an apprentice was not much, as a temporary teacher my salary was almost $2 600 but as an apprentice the allowance was only $800 and I had to work overtime to get more money. In December 1997, I got a big break and was employed as a trainee underwriter at Eagle Insurance company my starting salary was $3 000.00. The previous month the Zimbabwean dollar had tanked, I could not no longer afford the British Pounds for my CIMA studies. My employer at least could give me study loans for insurance related courses, I then enrolled for insurance studies with Insurance Institute of South Africa and the study fees were payable in Rands.

My older sister finally passed her O’Level exams and came to stay with me in Avondale Harare around 1999. I enrolled her for the A’Level night school classes at the University of Zimbabwe and this was a walking distance from where I was staying. I was also paying school fees for my two younger brothers. My youngest sister had got a scholarship but I still had to buy her groceries etc. My older sister passed her A’Level and got a job at a wholesaler and went back and started helping at home. The black and white TV broke down and I went to Meikles Stores and bought a 14” WRS colour TV on hire purchase and sent it home. I then bought a 29” WRS TV on auction at work at Diamond Insurance company. I took the bigger TV home and then started using the 14” TV. I realised as far as 1999 that my salary would never be enough to cover all my responsibilities. Growing up we had been raising broiler chicken at home. When I got my Old Mutual demutualisation shares, I sold them and with the money I bought many asbestos roofing sheets and a lot of wood. I built a bigger chicken run and I could keep 200 broilers at a time. I would collect the chicken using public transport and sell to my colleagues at work in Harare and collect money on pay day. When I got married to MaNyoni, she now also sold the chicken to her friends.

End of 2000, I got a loan to buy a big deep freezer from my employer AIG Zimbabwe, I hired a workmate to transport the freezer home. My mother had never had a fridge in her home, she had always relied on neighbours for a fridge. When we got home I had not told my mother that I was coming, it was a surprise, my mother started crying tears of joy. Around 2001 my sister would facilitate me to get scarce groceries from the wholesale she was working. Every week I would carry the groceries using buses and give it to my cousin who was working for my uncle at a shop in Mutoko about 10kms from our village in Murewa. With time I realised that my uncle was having problems with me making money from his shop. In December 2001 my employer was going to extend us another loan payable in 12 months. I took the loan on the pretence that I was going to buy furniture and when the cheque came I used the money to buy groceries and I opened my first shop in our village. Every Friday evening I would board the bus going to Murewa with new stock and would only come back on Sunday. It was during the land reform period and the neighbouring white commercial farmer in Virginia Macheke was forced out and I was invited to open a shop at the farm and that became my second shop.

In February 2002 my mother died, my youngest sister was already in University staying with me and my wife in Harare, my other brother was doing A’Level back home and the youngest brother was doing form 3 (grade 9). I became a manager in 2002 and I was given a company car being a Mazda 323. It became easier for me to travel to Murewa and Macheke with my own car. All my four siblings and my nephew wanted to come to Harare and stay with us. In 2003 MaNyoni and I moved out from the 2 roomed cottage we had been renting in Avondale and started renting a 3 bedroom house in Unit H, Chitungwiza. Avondale was very convenient for us but for the sake of the kids we had to sacrifice. Eveyone came back to stay with us. Two of my siblings were working, I considered them as children and I never asked them to contribute rentals or to buy food. I would go with them to Harare city centre including the one in university and the last born who was doing A’ Level in Emerald Hill. I asked my middle brother when he was around 22 years to move out after I spent two days looking for him he did not tell me that he was not coming home. I went to various police stations and his office looking for him. I feared he might have been in an accident along Chitungwiza road, the next day police suggested I go and check in the mortuary.

Staying with adults was causing tensions in the house, we continued like that but I realised it was putting a strain on my wife, my youngest sister was almost no longer speaking to my wife. I did spend a lot of time at work or at my shops. My job as a manager was also demanding and time consuming and then I had to drive to the shops midweek and on Friday evening collect money buy more stock on Saturday. So around 2003 before my elder sister transferred from Marondera to come to Harare, she asked if my youngest sister could come home and stay at the house since she was on a break from the university. One evening whilst we were watching TV, I asked my sister to go back home for the duration of the university break. My sister started shouting saying she knew that this was coming from my wife as she did not like her. I was taken aback, I had not even discussed this issue with my wife. From then onwards every time I have a fallout with my sister she starts attacking my wife. My sister then organised accommodation at the university and she moved out without my permission. She would come back the following year and I just accepted her to come back.

In January 2004 I got a better job that came with a double cab bakkie. It helped me to expand my retail shops. At one time I had 10 shops in Virginia Resettlement areas of Macheke and Hoyuyu Resettlement areas of Mutoko. In 2005 we moved to Marlborough. My youngest brother was finishing A’Level and my youngest sister had completed her degree. She moved out again without my permission and I gathered she was under pressure because her boyfriend was going to South Africa and he wanted someone to look after the property. When they came wanting to marry, I told them that I considered my sister to have eloped. My sister was very angry with that and it eventually affected everyone and I asked everyone to move out from my house. My youngest brother had also finished his A’Level and he sided with them and I told him to also go. I got told over and over again that I was seeing myself as the father yet we were all children. This freed me because in 2006 when the vacancy for Bulawayo Branch manager came up, I accepted it and in 2007 I could move to South Africa. Things were never the same between us.

Even though now I won’t sacrifice and help as I used to do because it is difficult to help people that you know do not appreciate your help. I know I am not perfect but I did better than many parents. I know many of my cousins whose parents could not afford to even pay for secondary school fees. I did my best and now I know my best was not good enough. I can sleep well at night knowing that I did my best. I never considered my siblings as a burden, I wanted the best for them as I knew how tough life was for us growing up. All of them finished A’Level and everyone is looking after themselves. I was asked to pay for South Africa university fees at the end of 2017, my wife agreed but I won’t put ourselves through that pressure again especially for people who do not appreciate. I know if I die today none of my siblings would do anything for my children. You see in life there are very few people who have the capacity to help other people and then the rest who look after their own interest. I think the time has come to put myself first. I never expected anyone to pay me back as I believe I was born as the first born for a reason, I believe god knew that my parents would leave this earth this soon and I would be left holding the fort.

Helping a close relative should not be seen as burden but it is part of our ubuntu. My approach is that teach a person to fish so that he can feed himself. We all need help one way or another. When I went to Harare, I was accommodated by my auntie for a few months until I got on my feet. When I came to South Africa in 2007, we stayed in my sister’s home for a week before we started renting out our own room and moved out.

DREAMS FROM MY MOTHER- GIRLS FROM POOR FAMILIES ARE GETTING A RAW DEAL FROM SOCIETY

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This past Sunday, I saw a news headline from Zimbabwe and it troubled me very much and drove me to set aside time to write this article even though this week I have been extremely busy at work. I asked myself this question, would I agree to a fist fight with one hand tied behind my back? Why do governments still accept this? If girls are not educated it means 50% of the population in that community will not fully participate in the economy. How can African countries compete on the global stage when so many women from poor families are not empowered through education? It also took me back to my high school days. A number of girls in my class whom I started form 1 (grade 8) with in 1990 at Nyameni secondary school in Marondera did not make it to O’Level class with me in 1993 as they dropped out of school when they became mothers. From what I remember none of the girls in my school proceeded with us to A-levels the following year. This situation just perpetuates poverty. At Marondera High School, in my class there were many competent girls who showed boys flames and went on to pursue science degrees at the University of Zimbabwe. It was Nelson Mandela who said, “education is the most powerful weapon which you can use to change the world”. Education helps girls to get careers and also join the middle class and help them and their families to also escape poverty. Educate a girl, you educate nation.

Many of you know that I and my four younger siblings were raised by my mother after my father died in 1990. The challenges that my mother faced in this deeply patriarchal society would determine our economic fortunes as well as our chances of escaping poverty. My mother was born Rangarirai Charity Kagoro in 1955 in a village in Murewa Zimbabwe, in her family there were four boys and five girls. My maternal grandfather was a wealthy man by village standards. My mother attended the United Methodist run Murewa Mission. She told me that she and her sisters wanted to continue with their education but her brother who had trained as a teacher at Nyadire College and her father decided that it was a waste of time to educate girls as they would be married off. Also at that time Rhodesia was being ruled by the racist government of Ian Smith and the education of the majority Africans was not a priority. It meant the end of my mother’s schooling, I believe she completed standard six. By the time I went to high school my mother could no longer assist me with my school work and all she could do was to give me words of encouragement. My mother was determined that my two sisters would also get the best education possible.

My mother married my father who came from a neighbouring village. My father had also completed standard six at Dombwe about 12kms from their home since at that time the nearest school to the village did not go as far as standard six and he could also not proceed with education after his father refused to sell cows from him to pursue his education further. My father would join the Rhodesian Police Force. My mother also wanted to join the police and my father refused because in his wisdom the woman had to stay home. A few years before my father’s death, my mother persuaded my father that they sign a civil marriage contract. That act would help to preserve my father’s estate for our benefit. I remember my parents went to the magistrate with two friends as witnesses to the magistrates’ court to sign the marriage contract that was around 1986-7. There were instant benefits for us. Now as a married couple they could now get a 2 bedroom or a 3 bedroom government accommodation and we no longer needed to share houses. My maternal grandfather was not happy when he learnt of the wedding without his blessings as he wanted to have all his lobola dues paid before he walked my mum down the aisle. My grandfather still believed the colonial law existed that always asked the permission from the father of the bride. Had my parents not entered into that marriage contract my father’s estate would have been squandered after his death.

In November 1990 a few weeks after my father’s death we gathered back at the village in Murewa. Firstly they read my father’s will and I remember these words, “ My wife and her kids will live wherever she prefers”. The expectation from both sides of the family was that my mum would come back to the village with her 5 children gets inherited as a wife by my uncle and become a peasant farmer like all the relatives. As part of the ritual my father’s only brother, his half brother and myself as the oldest son we were told to sit in front and my mother was given a stick and she had to choose whether she wanted to be inherited as a wife by either of my uncles. My mother only moving on her knees I saw her passing both my uncles and giving me the stick to signify that she did not wish to be inherited by either by my uncles as a wife and would rather look after her kids. We went back to the police accommodation in Marondera and waited for the government pension as well as my father’s insurance policy to pay out.

Around July 1991 my father’s pension came out and we had to leave the government accommodation. My mother took all the money and bought an incomplete house in Dombotombo township and we started living in the township. Life was tough and my mother told me that she wanted us to get a better education in the urban area hence she did not want to go back to the village, there were better schools and facilities in the town. My mother’s policy was that all children were the same and all of us had to do chores whether you were a boy or a girl. My cousins back in the village, girls were being married off after grade 7 and a lot of them died before they reached 18 or in their early 20s. A number of my cousins belong to Marange Apostolic Church, girls only go as far as grade 7 and they married into polygamous marriages after the 12^th birthday to much older men and they mostly have to fend for themselves and their babies. Members of the church are not allowed to seek medical help, so even when those young girls fell pregnant they do not get medical help, they give birth at the home. They believe in praying for diseases like malaria. A decade ago my cousin fell and broke a bone on his hand, he stopped going to school and it took his teachers to report to the police and he was taken to hospital to get a plaster and fortunately they did not disown him for getting medical help. The government is aware of this but then again it is scared of losing votes, every election the president of the ruling party visits Marange shrine to canvas votes from the hundreds of thousands of Marange church members.

The nearest secondary school to our village Jekwa Secondary school did not offer science classes and only went as far as O’ Level. In Marondera even though we were struggling at home, I was able to pursue science education at Marondera High School. Back in the township, I would meet bright students from some of the top schools in Zimbabwe at Dombotombo library. Life was hard those days, I would eat only in the morning and walk and run almost 6kms to Nyameni Secondary school and not eat anything during the day walk back another 6kms home and then only eat late in the afternoon at home. When I went to Marondera High School, I now had to walk almost 7kms to school. My mother was doing the best she could on a government pension, her gardening, buying and selling vegetables from the farmers’ market. We would raise broiler chicken for sale as well as run a tuck shop from our kitchen window. At times she would rent out two of the rooms and then 6 of us would use the remaining two rooms.

In 1995 I was completing A Level my two sisters were in form 4 and form 1 respectively. My mother gathered enough courage to go and confront my uncle in Harare to demand the money he had stolen. What had happened is that the government had posted the cheque for my father’s last salary for November 1990 to Jekwa school. My mother’s sister was teaching the crèche at the school and had collected the cheque. When my uncle learnt this she convinced my aunt to give him the cheque as he would deliver it to my mother in Marondera. My uncle went on to fraudulently cash the cheque in Harare and in Zimbabwe you can be jailed for this. My uncle was working for his other two cousins in a security company they had formed after being released from jail for stock thefts. My mother went alone to confront her alone and she was lucky that they did not assault her. My uncle dared her to report him to the police and he went on to say it was his brother’s money and he had every right to use the money. My uncle then said why was she showing off by sending me to A’ Level as I should have looked for work after O’ Level and as for girls they were supposed to have been married off after grade 7 since they could now read and write. Words have power as it is, all his sons only went as far as O’ Level and all his daughters got married after grade 7.

In early 1996 my mother’s fears came to pass. My sister had failed her O’Level examinations and she was pregnant. As the father figure, I told her to go and stay with her boyfriend. When I would come home during weekends from my temporary teaching job, I saw that she was coming home frequently with her baby and she was clearly struggling. I told mum that she could come back home with her kid. The following year she went to night school at Dombotombo primary school and passed her O’Level examinations. In 1999 I was staying in Avondale a walking distance to the University of Zimbabwe. My sister came to stay with me and started going to the A Level night school at the university. She managed to pass and got a job in a wholesaler and started looking after her son and also helping at home.

My youngest sister did also major in sciences and when her results came out we did not think she would be accepted in university and she came to stay with me in Harare and started going to Speciss college in Harare studying CIMA. When the university opened she was accepted into a BSC degree program. When my sister graduated around 2004-2005, I told her how I wished our mother had lived long enough to see this. When she also graduated with her Masters degree in Pretoria, I told my sister the same and when she eventually graduates with her Doctorate, I will still tell her the same thing.

 In 2007 we also left Zimbabwe after I was granted a South African work permit. My wife struggled to get a job despite her banking experience. The only job she was able to land was of being a waitress. We decided that she should not take the job and rather study for a degree. She wanted to study for a bachelor of commerce administration degree. I encouraged her to study with me for the Accounting degree as she is very good with numbers. She went on to graduate a semester ahead of me with very good marks. Around 2014 I drove to Zimbabwe and spent the day with a close relative from my wife’s side. This relative then told me that it was not advisable to educate a wife because once she starts working she might leave you and he gave me an example of a relative of theirs who sent the wife for nursing training and once she was working she left the husband. I just kept quiet and never responded to him. I know that I do not own anyone and why should I worry about how another person will choose to do with her life.

In my 23 years of working, I have had the privileged of being mentored by many exceptional women in my career. I benefit from the support and companionship of my beautiful wife MaNyoni. I will also celebrate the women who have had and some continue to have an impact in my professional life. At the end of 1997 when I was fortunate to get a big break to join the insurance industry, I was interviewed by Ms Pat Saukila at Eagle Insurance Company in Harare and I will be forever grateful for the opportunity. In 1999 I joined Diamond Insurance Company and our Managing Director was Mrs Grace Muradzikwa a distinguished leader, I learnt from her and her management team including her then General Manager Mr Isaac Gunda the importance of customer service. I was working in the personal lines claims department dealing with direct clients. When I had claim cheques that needed signing and when her managers when not available, her office was always accessible through her PA Gillian and she would always help us. My direct boss at that time was Ms Pepelapi Gumbo.

In 2000, I would join AIG Zimbabwe and I was recruited by Ms Pauline Arnold. My direct boss the claims manager at AIG was Ms Tendai Chingovo and she has been the most transformational figure in my career so far I have written in a previous blog the important lessons that I learnt from her (http://kanyokad.blogspot.com/2017/09/what-i-have-learnt-in-my-21-years-of.html . At the end of 2002, I joined Zimbabwe Insurance Brokers as a junior manager and I had the pleasure of working with many women including my peer Ms Shingi Chirinda then our Accountant, my deputy Ms Netsai Nyaundi and my secretary Mrs Loice Shangwa. I joined Zimnat Lion Insurance as an Underwriting Manager beginning of 2004, I was interviewed by our then Human Resources Director Mrs Lynn Mukonoweshuro. In my section I had very capable women including my then Chief Underwriter Mrs Rumbidzai Chinwada and my secretary Ms Sandra Chipunza. In the management team my peers included Ms Emilia Hatendi, Mrs Maureen Chigumadze, Mrs Betty Togarasei and Mrs Tambu Madzivire. When I became the Bulawayo branch Manager, I was reporting to Mrs Precious Chasara back in Harare head office and I found my new boss to be firm but fair. At the branch, I was assisted by many capable women including my deputy Mrs Vongai Machonisa and my secretary Alice.

After I joined OUTsurance in 2007, I was trained by Denise Van Burick and she became my boss for many months when she became the Acting Team Manager. My next lady Team Manager was Michelle De Winnar and I also learnt a lot from her. I then reported to Maureen Siobo and my manager’s boss was Lerato Rasentsoere. In 2015, I moved back to business claims and I reported to Isabel Erasmus until when I resigned in October 2017. When I came back to work in April 2018, I started reporting to Abigail Mampuru till the present day. There are a number of lady bosses in our department that I report, I am also very grateful for their help. Some of my friends at work who I would get advice from include Kim Naidoo, Rethabile Aphane and many more

I know that Zimbabwe is currently undergoing harsh economic challenges but it is my hope that the government and society in general does not abandon those girls who are leaving school for a number of reasons. If those girls are not fully integrated into the economy that will not only condemn those women but their children also to a life of poverty. I saw it with my mother, she worked hard growing vegetables and maize and other crops during rainy seasons on the municipality land. Some years the municipality would slash down the crops. She would wake up around 4am to go to the farmer’s market. Despite all this handwork, she earned very little income and we would run out of basic foodstuffs like mealie meal. I see it every morning in Pretoria with ladies making vetkoeks along the city’s road and selling them for around R1 each. They get into town around 5am after travelling from townships that are about 40kms away from the city centre. A lot of the ladies also work six days a week as domestic workers in the suburbs earning minimum wage. Despite their hard work they won’t make much money. My prayer is that those young girls stay in school until at least they finish their high school to give them a chance in life and also break the cycle of poverty.

From my 23 years experience working in both the government and in the private sector, I support the call to have an equal number of women as men in the workforce including in top management structures. This will help to eradicate the toxic masculinity that we come across, as we have seen absolute power corrupts whether in politics but also in organisations. A lot of strides have been made for example when South African President Mr Cyril Ramaphosa announced his cabinet, gender balance was 50/50 and it was the same in provincial government. The issue of women rights affects women of all races and all faiths. For example in the Employment Equity legislation in South Africa women of all races are listed as a designated group that must benefit as there are very few women of any race in the top management structures of many big organisations. On the legal front important changes are coming through for example the Harneker judgement in the High Court in Cape Town and later confirmed by the Constitutional Court of South Africa recognising all surviving spouses married under Muslim Law (polygamy) in Wills Act.

All of us we can help change the world, one girl at a time.

God bless